Nearly 35 years as a violence-prevention and intervention specialist informs the resources, consultation and training I’m able to offer, including messaging and framing. My work has been focused on supporting dignity and healing for those who have been exposed to violence and trauma, with a particular focus on males. My most recent projects include participation in an assessment of the Victims Services of the Baltimore Police Department; and in an evaluation for the Diocese of Springfield, MA of its practices in response to sexual abuse by clergy.Over the years, I have repeatedly witnessed the enormous potential of expanding our view to focus on healing rather than fear when confronted with the maladaptive coping strategies often used by males who have experienced trauma. As it turns out, that includes most males. I’ve been inspired by individuals and remarkable programs that have shown we’ve come a long way in addressing that challenge - and that we can do better.As an older, white, man, I recognize that I’ve moved through life with many privileges and advantages that I’ve often taken for granted. My lived experience has shaped how I have viewed the world.And, I’ve learned many humbling lessons about others’ experiences and what shapes their world view. I came to understand more fully, that many of the folks I’ve attempted to serve over the last three decades as a social worker and activist are seeing and hearing very different messages in the outreach and services we providers offer from the ones we may intend to present, or from the resources they may actually need, given their lived experiences. We need to listen.Several simple (though certainly not simple to implement), trauma-responsive guidelines for working with males emerged. Most relate to emotional and physical safety:• Promote dignity by eliminating shaming as a tool to motivate change. • Provide males cover for walking in the door. Frame services around initially establishing safe, meaningful relationships related to something other than victimization. • In our families and circles, self-consciously support norm changes in rigidity about masculinity. Expand the emotional survival options for men when they feel vulnerable or face conflict. • Explore the many ways that fear has been an historic driver of harmful personal interactions, social policy and laws. • Increase knowledge about positive, evidence-based, alternative solutions to motivate changes in behavior and encourage healing.