We often come to therapy with pre-conceived ideas. We believe that we are faulty, damaged, or flawed, and we desperately need to be fixed up or repaired. Sometimes we even refer to ourselves as “damaged goods”. We often believe we are lacking important components such as “confidence” or “self-esteem”. Or we believe we have faulty parts that need to be removed such as feelings of anxiety, or negative thoughts, or painful memories. Most mechanistic models readily reinforce these notions,… Show more We often come to therapy with pre-conceived ideas. We believe that we are faulty, damaged, or flawed, and we desperately need to be fixed up or repaired. Sometimes we even refer to ourselves as “damaged goods”. We often believe we are lacking important components such as “confidence” or “self-esteem”. Or we believe we have faulty parts that need to be removed such as feelings of anxiety, or negative thoughts, or painful memories. Most mechanistic models readily reinforce these notions, through two processes: (i) They use words that imply we have faulty or damaged components in our minds - e.g. terms such as “dysfunctional”, “maladaptive”, “irrational”, or “negative”; (ii) They use a wide variety of tools and techniques designed to directly reduce, replace or remove these unwanted thoughts and feelings (usually on the assumption that this is an essential step for improving quality of life). Psychotherapy should not set out to reduce or eliminate “symptoms”; instead it should aim to fundamentally transform a person’s relationship with their thoughts and feelings, so they do no longer perceive them as “symptoms”. After all, the moment we label a thought or feeling as a “symptom”, that implies that it is “bad”, “harmful”, “abnormal”, and therefore something we need to get rid of in order to be normal and healthy. Show less

SPP is a non-profit community organization that provides psychotherapy services to low-income individuals and families.

Prior to 2008, I was fortunate to have the unique opportunity of owning an integrative psychology facility (Brooklyn Heights Lifestyle Management) in Montreal. It had a complete private gym and consulting offices housed in a 1500 square foot loft. I was fortunate to work with a great bunch of clients, many who had interesting personalities. Given my penchant for confidentiality, none will be named but all are dear to my heart. Albeit many clients were famous or well-known, all were famous in… Show more Prior to 2008, I was fortunate to have the unique opportunity of owning an integrative psychology facility (Brooklyn Heights Lifestyle Management) in Montreal. It had a complete private gym and consulting offices housed in a 1500 square foot loft. I was fortunate to work with a great bunch of clients, many who had interesting personalities. Given my penchant for confidentiality, none will be named but all are dear to my heart. Albeit many clients were famous or well-known, all were famous in their own right. Alas, the facility was sadly retired as a I was destined to move to the country. As many will attest, that plan went into another direction. As a result, I remained in the city and took a one-year sabbatical to write and relax. Show less