Squatch Health

Squatch Health is a wilderness-tested insurance carrier entering the Marketplace for Open Enrollment 2026. Built for the bold, the elusive, and those who vanish off-grid, our plans offer rugged benefits, mystical support, and just enough coverage to keep your premiums from wandering. 🦶 Coverage highlights: -Jeep or helicopter evac (when your hike gets too adventurous) -Vision coverage that helps you spot the unspottable -Hearing tuned to pick up tree knocks and distant howls -Telehealth available (forest Wi-Fi permitting) 🌲 Currently sighted in: -Florida Swamp Camouflage Zone -East Texas Pine Cover Patrol Region 🌕 Expansion rumored in: -Appalachia -The Pacific Northwest 🛸 This page is part of a legendary parody campaign by PNR & Associates, Inc. We can neither confirm nor deny actual Bigfoot involvement. (But if he ever needs ACA coverage, we’ve got him.)